Here are the fruits of Grimmtooth's labor... suitable for framing, digital wallpaper, or greeting cards to your beloved family.
Thanks to Grimmtooth, Nutsack will never be forgotten. Brings a tear to my eye - it really does.
Mortigan the Honored
Thursday, February 24, 2011
Grimmtooth Takes Up The Banner
OMG. Grimmtooth over at http://grimmtooth.blogspot.com has taken up the banner for Nutsack as Posterboy of the New Dungeon Finder Tool, and made actual posters!
Here are the fruits of Grimmtooth's labor... suitable for framing, digital wallpaper, or greeting cards to your beloved family.
Thanks to Grimmtooth, Nutsack will never be forgotten. Brings a tear to my eye - it really does.
Mortigan the Honored
Here are the fruits of Grimmtooth's labor... suitable for framing, digital wallpaper, or greeting cards to your beloved family.
Thanks to Grimmtooth, Nutsack will never be forgotten. Brings a tear to my eye - it really does.
Mortigan the Honored
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
For the Love of Grouping
GROUP MEMBER INITIATES A VOTE TO KICK THE TANK. REASON:
nutsack
YES OR NO?
I can't really say if our tank was a nutsack. We had just wiped - quickly - on the first boss in Grim Batol, and I'd been so busy watching my auras, cooldowns, and cast bar that I didn't even notice the rest of my group was dead until Omen printed "ATTACKING YOU!!!" in thousand-point font across my screen. When that appeared, I cast one last Incinerate for all the pretty unicorns, said goodbye to Karuri my ever-faithful imp, then made my peace with the great black and white.
I was reluctant to vote on the nutsackiness of our tank. We'd only been grouping for 5 minutes or so, the trash so far gave no indication of trouble ahead, and I was clueless as to the cause of our wipe. So I just stared at the box on the screen, doing nothing. I hoped it would go away without me pressing anything. After a few seconds, it did. And so did the tank. He'd either been booted back to wherever he came from, or he saw what was coming and bailed.
In general, I'm against booting for poor performance, and back in my Wrath days, I grouped with some SERIOUSLY under-performing people. But I always kept my mouth shut, gritted my teeth, sucked it up, and stuck it out. One tank in particular, whose name has mercifully been erased from my mind, could easily be awarded the grand title WORST TANK EVER. But she liked grouping with me for some reason, and would frequently whisper "Hi Mort! Will you come DPS?" and often throw in little smiley faces to ensure I couldn't refuse. I'd check my gold to be sure I could afford the outrageous repair bill soon to come, then make my way toward the impending festival of failure. With her at the helm, we would wipe at least 7 or 8 times attempting to clear Utgarde Pinnacle - by far the easiest heroic in the game. It was brutal with her, but she was oblivious. "Thanks, Mort! See you tomorrow? =o)" And as much as I feared that possibility, I knew I would definitely group with her tomorrow if she asked. Why? Because behind all the digital armor, there was a real person. And she'd probably already heard plenty of unedited rants about her tanking - from people who either didn't care or consider that real feelings might get hurt. Throw into the mix that she might only be 8 years old, and the right to be verbally abusive gets very shaky indeed.
After the near-fatal Wrath Babies post, I resolved to stop comparing everything to Wrath, stop talking about the "good old days" and get on board the Cataclysm bandwagon. But with grouping there is definitely a huge difference between Wrath days and now, and I'm nominating Nutsack as the poster boy for that difference.
The new-to-me Dungeon Tool does its job very well. It assembles groups and drops them face-first into a dungeon, with no questions asked and no begging for tanks or healers. If someone gets disconnected, a replacement is automatically found in seconds. When you're in a hurry for points, the Dungeon Tool is your best friend. And I've got to admit, it's great being able to do whatever I want while waiting in queue. The ease of grouping has Mortigan at least standing NEAR the bandwagon, if not yet fully on it.
But then there's poor Nutsack. He wanted to group a regular instance. He was probably wearing greens. I never checked. When I landed on my face in Grim Batol, I was too busy trying to fire off my own few buffs while running toward the trash-fight already underway (since there is no longer a period of wait-while-we-all-buff-and-put-our-helmets-on-straight before picking a fight with the opening trash). If Nutsack had been on the old LFG tool, he would have been limited to people on his own server, and would have likely had to use a healer that he already knew. DPS would have been personally recruited for the job, and we all would have had PLENTY of time to figure out how well Nutsack was going to do before we ever even got anywhere NEAR the dungeon. After all, even once the group was full, it would still be another 10 to 20 minutes while people traveled. There would have been time for lots of talking:
Nutsack: "Hey guys, I finally got my green Tank gear! I'm ready to give it a try in Grim Batol!"
Us: "Have you tanked much?"
Nutsack: "No, but we should be good. I've got a GREAT healer."
Warnings would be going off in everyone's mind. The smell of fail would be thick in the air. Enter At Your Own Risk. If anyone went along, they'd know what kind of a ride they were in for. No surprises. And Nutsack would lead us through the brutal wipefest one trash pile at a time. But he wouldn't get kicked. And when we're done, there would be a BOND. We survived the Nutsack Run! And I'd be sure to add the healer to my Friends list, because good healers patient enough to stick out a run like that are worth their weight in gold.
And that's how real reputations would start to form. The old LFG Tool was personal. You could read the names of people already in the group. And if you'd been around, you'd quickly know whether you wanted to sign up or not: "Uh oh. Nutsack's tanking that one. Better wait for the next group!" Eventually, those of us who performed decently built up a loose set of friends that were always grouping together. Even in most random 25-man raids, I'd recognize almost all the names. I'd already run Heroics with pretty much every one of them. I might not remember much about them, but I'd know if they were nutsacks or not.
With the new tool, all of that is gone. If poor little Nutsack really was a nutsack, I guess the new tool works in his favor. He'll be off leading some other group to their deaths within seconds. His name will be quickly forgotten, and he won't end up on anyone's bad list because he doesn't even exist on the same server. Anonymity is his shield and his cloak.
But on the flipside, there is no comraderie for those of us who strive to do our jobs well. The healers I run with now don't need to be on my Friends list. I'll likely never see them again. And I'll never be shouting for one in Stormwind. A healer will be automatically assigned to me. It's great and terrible all at the same time. I absolutely LOVE grouping. I like that the new tool gets me a group quickly, and gets the dungeon started immediately. But I miss the friendship building, and the willingness to stick it out when things get tough. After all, Nutsack will finally get his purples, and there may come a day when he leads us to victory.
Goodbye, Nutsack - whoever you were.
Mortigan of the Half Wagon
nutsack
YES OR NO?
I can't really say if our tank was a nutsack. We had just wiped - quickly - on the first boss in Grim Batol, and I'd been so busy watching my auras, cooldowns, and cast bar that I didn't even notice the rest of my group was dead until Omen printed "ATTACKING YOU!!!" in thousand-point font across my screen. When that appeared, I cast one last Incinerate for all the pretty unicorns, said goodbye to Karuri my ever-faithful imp, then made my peace with the great black and white.
I was reluctant to vote on the nutsackiness of our tank. We'd only been grouping for 5 minutes or so, the trash so far gave no indication of trouble ahead, and I was clueless as to the cause of our wipe. So I just stared at the box on the screen, doing nothing. I hoped it would go away without me pressing anything. After a few seconds, it did. And so did the tank. He'd either been booted back to wherever he came from, or he saw what was coming and bailed.
In general, I'm against booting for poor performance, and back in my Wrath days, I grouped with some SERIOUSLY under-performing people. But I always kept my mouth shut, gritted my teeth, sucked it up, and stuck it out. One tank in particular, whose name has mercifully been erased from my mind, could easily be awarded the grand title WORST TANK EVER. But she liked grouping with me for some reason, and would frequently whisper "Hi Mort! Will you come DPS?" and often throw in little smiley faces to ensure I couldn't refuse. I'd check my gold to be sure I could afford the outrageous repair bill soon to come, then make my way toward the impending festival of failure. With her at the helm, we would wipe at least 7 or 8 times attempting to clear Utgarde Pinnacle - by far the easiest heroic in the game. It was brutal with her, but she was oblivious. "Thanks, Mort! See you tomorrow? =o)" And as much as I feared that possibility, I knew I would definitely group with her tomorrow if she asked. Why? Because behind all the digital armor, there was a real person. And she'd probably already heard plenty of unedited rants about her tanking - from people who either didn't care or consider that real feelings might get hurt. Throw into the mix that she might only be 8 years old, and the right to be verbally abusive gets very shaky indeed.
After the near-fatal Wrath Babies post, I resolved to stop comparing everything to Wrath, stop talking about the "good old days" and get on board the Cataclysm bandwagon. But with grouping there is definitely a huge difference between Wrath days and now, and I'm nominating Nutsack as the poster boy for that difference.
The new-to-me Dungeon Tool does its job very well. It assembles groups and drops them face-first into a dungeon, with no questions asked and no begging for tanks or healers. If someone gets disconnected, a replacement is automatically found in seconds. When you're in a hurry for points, the Dungeon Tool is your best friend. And I've got to admit, it's great being able to do whatever I want while waiting in queue. The ease of grouping has Mortigan at least standing NEAR the bandwagon, if not yet fully on it.
But then there's poor Nutsack. He wanted to group a regular instance. He was probably wearing greens. I never checked. When I landed on my face in Grim Batol, I was too busy trying to fire off my own few buffs while running toward the trash-fight already underway (since there is no longer a period of wait-while-we-all-buff-and-put-our-helmets-on-straight before picking a fight with the opening trash). If Nutsack had been on the old LFG tool, he would have been limited to people on his own server, and would have likely had to use a healer that he already knew. DPS would have been personally recruited for the job, and we all would have had PLENTY of time to figure out how well Nutsack was going to do before we ever even got anywhere NEAR the dungeon. After all, even once the group was full, it would still be another 10 to 20 minutes while people traveled. There would have been time for lots of talking:
Nutsack: "Hey guys, I finally got my green Tank gear! I'm ready to give it a try in Grim Batol!"
Us: "Have you tanked much?"
Nutsack: "No, but we should be good. I've got a GREAT healer."
Warnings would be going off in everyone's mind. The smell of fail would be thick in the air. Enter At Your Own Risk. If anyone went along, they'd know what kind of a ride they were in for. No surprises. And Nutsack would lead us through the brutal wipefest one trash pile at a time. But he wouldn't get kicked. And when we're done, there would be a BOND. We survived the Nutsack Run! And I'd be sure to add the healer to my Friends list, because good healers patient enough to stick out a run like that are worth their weight in gold.
And that's how real reputations would start to form. The old LFG Tool was personal. You could read the names of people already in the group. And if you'd been around, you'd quickly know whether you wanted to sign up or not: "Uh oh. Nutsack's tanking that one. Better wait for the next group!" Eventually, those of us who performed decently built up a loose set of friends that were always grouping together. Even in most random 25-man raids, I'd recognize almost all the names. I'd already run Heroics with pretty much every one of them. I might not remember much about them, but I'd know if they were nutsacks or not.
With the new tool, all of that is gone. If poor little Nutsack really was a nutsack, I guess the new tool works in his favor. He'll be off leading some other group to their deaths within seconds. His name will be quickly forgotten, and he won't end up on anyone's bad list because he doesn't even exist on the same server. Anonymity is his shield and his cloak.
But on the flipside, there is no comraderie for those of us who strive to do our jobs well. The healers I run with now don't need to be on my Friends list. I'll likely never see them again. And I'll never be shouting for one in Stormwind. A healer will be automatically assigned to me. It's great and terrible all at the same time. I absolutely LOVE grouping. I like that the new tool gets me a group quickly, and gets the dungeon started immediately. But I miss the friendship building, and the willingness to stick it out when things get tough. After all, Nutsack will finally get his purples, and there may come a day when he leads us to victory.
Goodbye, Nutsack - whoever you were.
Mortigan of the Half Wagon
Thursday, February 17, 2011
The Near Death of Mortigan, or How Grim Batol Saved Him
If you've come here today with the hope of reading the latest tongue-in-cheek "how-to" guide stuffed with dangerously bad advice and ill-informed opinions, I'm giving you this chance up front to run like a fool from this post. My mood towards Warcraft has been worsening the last few days, and I've been on the brink of sending Morty back to the grave indefinitely. To talk about all this will take some back-tracking, some cobbling-together of different things, and certainly some rambling and unnecessary tangents, but if you hang through it with me, I promise some satisfaction in the end. I might not leave you with a sense of heroic triumph, but I'm not going to leave you saying, "Well, THAT wrecked my mood today." You've got Morty's promise on that.
Let's get to it. Roll back the clock to when Wrath of the Lich King was still fairly new - to when the Crusader's Coliseum had just been built and Faction Champions would make even the best-geared raid team cry like a one-year-old with a pamper full of poo. To a time when you weren't even allowed to try to kill Arthas. That was the world in which Mortigan was living and raiding. Early word of Cataclysm back then had everyone abuzz. And Cata was largely seen as a way to make the old zones fun and exciting again. It was going to bring a sense of newness to the game for Alts, and get players back into long-empty zones. There was some talk of high-end content for raiders, but the focus was always on those old zones and getting people interested in replaying lower-level content.
Move ahead a little to November 2009. Mortigan was raiding the Crusader's Coliseum and picked up a Trophy of the Crusade - crucial for getting into some SERIOUS raid gear. But before I could ever put that Trophy to use, I became a father, and decided very quickly to kill Mortigan, this blog, and my twitter account. Better to go out on top, I decided, than fill this blog with messages like, "Well, I don't really play any more, but wouldn't it be cool if when Cataclysm rolls out we could <insert your game fantasy that will never happen here>.?!" I just wasn't up for that kind of lameness.
So for over a year, I was gone from Azeroth, and did not keep tabs on the changes. Apparently, there were a lot more changes than just Cataclysm. I still don't really know everything that happened or why - but some serious retooling went on while I was away, such as the Dungeon tool change briefly discussed in my previous rant.
Jump forward now to the launch of Cataclysm. Word of a major event such as that will reach even those of us deeply stunned by baby-aggro. And now that I've maxed out my Babycare skill and earned the proper Achieve, there is more time to devote to gaming. So Mortigan's grave was dug up, and suddenly there he was, standing in an empty Dalaran, wondering why the portals to everywhere else were gone. Mort found himself quickly disoriented and desperately out of date.
The last few weeks up to now have been spent trying to fathom the following as Mortigan quested to 85:
1. What the heck happened to the Talent Specs?
2. Where are the portals now?
3. What the heck are Justice Points, how do I earn them, and where do I spend them?
4. What is this new LFG Tool and why can't I group whatever I want?
These mysteries are now solved to varying degrees of satisfaction, but the sense of disorientation and outdatedness persist.
It was twitter though that started the recent downward spiral that almost killed Morty for good. I was looking for new WoW Players to follow, and came across @druidmain who was quitting twitter and WoW. Reading her post Why I Dislike Wrath Babies in Heroics was a wooden stake through the heart of Mortigan, this blog, and a large percent of my more crotchety tweets. She basically exposed Mortigan as an outdated product of Wrath, who needed to get with the Cataclysm program or pack it in. And stop whining about why things aren't like they used to be. She had a very strong point, and the effects of that one post will likely reverberate through much of my future posts here. Hopefully I can still be funny, but the fun won't come from "Wish it was the Good old days" foolery.
That Wrath Baby post left me feeling much more out of date than ever. Coupled with the fact that I could not run Heroics with my new guild - and SHOULDN'T based on Druidmain's writing - there suddenly seemed little reason to keep Morty around. It just wasn't fun being out of date, out of place, and left behind. The killing stroke was the fact that I hadn't even SEEN any guildies in the weeks that I'd spent on their server. Morty was done and dead. On the drive home from work yesterday, I made up my mind to finish off Morty once and for all, bid a fond farewell on this blog, and sign out of twitter for the last time. I had other hobbies to consider - photography and music sequencing - which should be able to fill the Warcraft void.
But when I got home, I decided to give it one last shot. Immediately upon logging in, I opened the dreaded Dungeon Tool I so recently bashed on this blog, and set up Morty as DPS for any random dungeon. I decided to follow the sage advice of Reanimatrix and others who advised me to just fess up that I was new to Cata Dungeons before we got started. The worst that would happen is I get booted from the group. Within 10 minutes I received the queue notice, and was teleported to Grim Batol.
The group had already started clearing trash as I ran in. I was a bit nervous, but had my head on straight enough to replace the voidwalker with an instant-cast (soulburned) imp, and cast available buffs and whatnot while running toward the fight underway. I then set about the very familiar task of SETTING CREATURES ON FIRE. No AoE - I'd read enough vague warnings to avoid the Rain of Fire, and just got down to the business of my heavy destruction rotation. As soon as the trash was cleared, I fessed up that I'd never been in Grim Batol. No one cared. "It's pretty easy." was the only thing said. In fact, not much after that was said at all. I've read that the silence is a negative by-product of the new Dungeon tool. But in my nervousness caused by not knowing ANYTHING about the instance (I haven't researched the fights yet), I was happy in that silence. It helped me focus on the job of burning things.
The group was not that well organized. I could discern no method to the order that we killed the mobs. I'd try to wait a few seconds at the start of each fight to figure out who to target first (which helped the tank better establish aggro anyway), but the best I could do is pick the mob who seemed to be losing health the fastest, since it seemed our group was attacking multiple mobs simultaneously. This also prevented my Fear from being effective CC, as often my feared target would take damage and the spell would break. But since we seemed to be downing the mobs fairly well overall, I didn't want to inject rigidness where it wasn't necessary. And since I was the new guy anyway, I thought it best to keep my rant-maker SHUT. We wiped on the first boss, but that turned out to be our only wipe for the night. My green warlock cookies were still warmly accepted, and the Soul Stone on our healer saved the day more than once. I was feeling useful. And of course I kept a close eye on Recount. I had climbed my way into the #2 slot, and stayed there firmly throughout the dungeon. Considering the amount of time I spent in sheep form, stunned into unresponsiveness, or casting Fear on adds, I was very happy in that #2 slot. Grim Batol overall was a heck of a lot of fun. A great instance with no real mechanics needed other than your ability to play your class correctly. And Morty held up his end of the bargain. There was MUCH fire and flame dished out. Crits were taking visible chunks of health out of enemies. The Hurricane enchant I'd put on my Very Manly Staff was paying back in piles of Haste. And my little imp was charging me up with frequent instant-cast Soul Fires - a real treat that I don't see while questing with my Voidwalker. It was a flaming good time!
Sure it wasn't a Heroic. There were no guildies with me. I may never see those people I grouped with again. With the randomness feature, though, who knows. But overall I came to one real conclusion: Wrath baby or not, out of date or not, disoriented or confused, Mortigan nevertheless holds his own, and has a place on Azeroth. So I'll be sticking around, and playing what's available. The Guild, the Heroics, and the Raids can wait. For now, Morty will be running regular instances for justice points, gearing up, working his Alchemy for cash, and biding his time. And when Mortigan's time does finally come, there will be much fire and pain for those in the way.
Mortigan the Cata-Instance Deflowered
Let's get to it. Roll back the clock to when Wrath of the Lich King was still fairly new - to when the Crusader's Coliseum had just been built and Faction Champions would make even the best-geared raid team cry like a one-year-old with a pamper full of poo. To a time when you weren't even allowed to try to kill Arthas. That was the world in which Mortigan was living and raiding. Early word of Cataclysm back then had everyone abuzz. And Cata was largely seen as a way to make the old zones fun and exciting again. It was going to bring a sense of newness to the game for Alts, and get players back into long-empty zones. There was some talk of high-end content for raiders, but the focus was always on those old zones and getting people interested in replaying lower-level content.
Move ahead a little to November 2009. Mortigan was raiding the Crusader's Coliseum and picked up a Trophy of the Crusade - crucial for getting into some SERIOUS raid gear. But before I could ever put that Trophy to use, I became a father, and decided very quickly to kill Mortigan, this blog, and my twitter account. Better to go out on top, I decided, than fill this blog with messages like, "Well, I don't really play any more, but wouldn't it be cool if when Cataclysm rolls out we could <insert your game fantasy that will never happen here>.?!" I just wasn't up for that kind of lameness.
So for over a year, I was gone from Azeroth, and did not keep tabs on the changes. Apparently, there were a lot more changes than just Cataclysm. I still don't really know everything that happened or why - but some serious retooling went on while I was away, such as the Dungeon tool change briefly discussed in my previous rant.
Jump forward now to the launch of Cataclysm. Word of a major event such as that will reach even those of us deeply stunned by baby-aggro. And now that I've maxed out my Babycare skill and earned the proper Achieve, there is more time to devote to gaming. So Mortigan's grave was dug up, and suddenly there he was, standing in an empty Dalaran, wondering why the portals to everywhere else were gone. Mort found himself quickly disoriented and desperately out of date.
The last few weeks up to now have been spent trying to fathom the following as Mortigan quested to 85:
1. What the heck happened to the Talent Specs?
2. Where are the portals now?
3. What the heck are Justice Points, how do I earn them, and where do I spend them?
4. What is this new LFG Tool and why can't I group whatever I want?
These mysteries are now solved to varying degrees of satisfaction, but the sense of disorientation and outdatedness persist.
It was twitter though that started the recent downward spiral that almost killed Morty for good. I was looking for new WoW Players to follow, and came across @druidmain who was quitting twitter and WoW. Reading her post Why I Dislike Wrath Babies in Heroics was a wooden stake through the heart of Mortigan, this blog, and a large percent of my more crotchety tweets. She basically exposed Mortigan as an outdated product of Wrath, who needed to get with the Cataclysm program or pack it in. And stop whining about why things aren't like they used to be. She had a very strong point, and the effects of that one post will likely reverberate through much of my future posts here. Hopefully I can still be funny, but the fun won't come from "Wish it was the Good old days" foolery.
That Wrath Baby post left me feeling much more out of date than ever. Coupled with the fact that I could not run Heroics with my new guild - and SHOULDN'T based on Druidmain's writing - there suddenly seemed little reason to keep Morty around. It just wasn't fun being out of date, out of place, and left behind. The killing stroke was the fact that I hadn't even SEEN any guildies in the weeks that I'd spent on their server. Morty was done and dead. On the drive home from work yesterday, I made up my mind to finish off Morty once and for all, bid a fond farewell on this blog, and sign out of twitter for the last time. I had other hobbies to consider - photography and music sequencing - which should be able to fill the Warcraft void.
But when I got home, I decided to give it one last shot. Immediately upon logging in, I opened the dreaded Dungeon Tool I so recently bashed on this blog, and set up Morty as DPS for any random dungeon. I decided to follow the sage advice of Reanimatrix and others who advised me to just fess up that I was new to Cata Dungeons before we got started. The worst that would happen is I get booted from the group. Within 10 minutes I received the queue notice, and was teleported to Grim Batol.
The group had already started clearing trash as I ran in. I was a bit nervous, but had my head on straight enough to replace the voidwalker with an instant-cast (soulburned) imp, and cast available buffs and whatnot while running toward the fight underway. I then set about the very familiar task of SETTING CREATURES ON FIRE. No AoE - I'd read enough vague warnings to avoid the Rain of Fire, and just got down to the business of my heavy destruction rotation. As soon as the trash was cleared, I fessed up that I'd never been in Grim Batol. No one cared. "It's pretty easy." was the only thing said. In fact, not much after that was said at all. I've read that the silence is a negative by-product of the new Dungeon tool. But in my nervousness caused by not knowing ANYTHING about the instance (I haven't researched the fights yet), I was happy in that silence. It helped me focus on the job of burning things.
The group was not that well organized. I could discern no method to the order that we killed the mobs. I'd try to wait a few seconds at the start of each fight to figure out who to target first (which helped the tank better establish aggro anyway), but the best I could do is pick the mob who seemed to be losing health the fastest, since it seemed our group was attacking multiple mobs simultaneously. This also prevented my Fear from being effective CC, as often my feared target would take damage and the spell would break. But since we seemed to be downing the mobs fairly well overall, I didn't want to inject rigidness where it wasn't necessary. And since I was the new guy anyway, I thought it best to keep my rant-maker SHUT. We wiped on the first boss, but that turned out to be our only wipe for the night. My green warlock cookies were still warmly accepted, and the Soul Stone on our healer saved the day more than once. I was feeling useful. And of course I kept a close eye on Recount. I had climbed my way into the #2 slot, and stayed there firmly throughout the dungeon. Considering the amount of time I spent in sheep form, stunned into unresponsiveness, or casting Fear on adds, I was very happy in that #2 slot. Grim Batol overall was a heck of a lot of fun. A great instance with no real mechanics needed other than your ability to play your class correctly. And Morty held up his end of the bargain. There was MUCH fire and flame dished out. Crits were taking visible chunks of health out of enemies. The Hurricane enchant I'd put on my Very Manly Staff was paying back in piles of Haste. And my little imp was charging me up with frequent instant-cast Soul Fires - a real treat that I don't see while questing with my Voidwalker. It was a flaming good time!
Sure it wasn't a Heroic. There were no guildies with me. I may never see those people I grouped with again. With the randomness feature, though, who knows. But overall I came to one real conclusion: Wrath baby or not, out of date or not, disoriented or confused, Mortigan nevertheless holds his own, and has a place on Azeroth. So I'll be sticking around, and playing what's available. The Guild, the Heroics, and the Raids can wait. For now, Morty will be running regular instances for justice points, gearing up, working his Alchemy for cash, and biding his time. And when Mortigan's time does finally come, there will be much fire and pain for those in the way.
Mortigan the Cata-Instance Deflowered
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
The Group Nazi: "NO QUEUE FOR YOU!!!"
A little over a year ago, in Wrath, I LOVED grouping. I happily ran Heroics and Raids over and over, and kept running them even long after I'd obtained all possible drops useful to me. Those instances were just dang cool all around. And in running pugs over and over, Mortigan became part of a very loose crew of raiders who were always throwing in together for various encounters. I'd often get an invite, and with a quick scan of the roster, I could immediately say, "With this crew, we got this IN THE BAG." or "Oh crap, this will be a wipefest."
But those raid-with-who-you-know times are gone, or at least seem to be, as I try to understand this new-to-me incomprehensible grouping tool. I guess it is designed to eliminate piles of half-filled groups all hollering for a healer. With that potential benefit in mind, I thought I'd give the new tool a chance. After all, maybe I've just been reluctant to learn something new. So I put on a positive face and decided to try grouping.
Last night was my big moment. My time to shine. To finally join the ranks of my new guild in a Heroic and show them how well Morty sets things on fire even when dressed in blues and greens. I had just wrapped up the crazy-long quest chain for the Overly Intelligent Robes in Twilight Highlands, and was ready for some serious 5-man action. The guild needed me. I was ready. The green text beckoned:
Apparently the new LFG Tool is the Group Nazi. "NO QUEUE FOR YOU!!!" I remember being under-geared in the old days - sometimes WAY under-geared - but the rest of the crew was solid enough to carry us through. And I usually got an item or two that helped me progress in a hurry. Not any more. "GREEN PANTS?! NO QUEUE FOR YOU!!!"
And so they replace me and take off without me. I'm left standing in the middle of the Twilight Highlands, looking at an Elk who warily wonders if I'm going to set him afire. Somehow, I'm not hungry for venison just now.
Mortigan the Denied
But those raid-with-who-you-know times are gone, or at least seem to be, as I try to understand this new-to-me incomprehensible grouping tool. I guess it is designed to eliminate piles of half-filled groups all hollering for a healer. With that potential benefit in mind, I thought I'd give the new tool a chance. After all, maybe I've just been reluctant to learn something new. So I put on a positive face and decided to try grouping.
Last night was my big moment. My time to shine. To finally join the ranks of my new guild in a Heroic and show them how well Morty sets things on fire even when dressed in blues and greens. I had just wrapped up the crazy-long quest chain for the Overly Intelligent Robes in Twilight Highlands, and was ready for some serious 5-man action. The guild needed me. I was ready. The green text beckoned:
"Mort, we need DPS. You up for it?"
"Sure!" I respond enthusiastically.GUILDIE INVITES YOU TO JOIN A GROUP. ACCEPT?
I click 'Yes' without hesitation. The box disappears, but nothing happens."Sorry, Morty, you can't join the queue. Your gear is too low."
Apparently the new LFG Tool is the Group Nazi. "NO QUEUE FOR YOU!!!" I remember being under-geared in the old days - sometimes WAY under-geared - but the rest of the crew was solid enough to carry us through. And I usually got an item or two that helped me progress in a hurry. Not any more. "GREEN PANTS?! NO QUEUE FOR YOU!!!"
And so they replace me and take off without me. I'm left standing in the middle of the Twilight Highlands, looking at an Elk who warily wonders if I'm going to set him afire. Somehow, I'm not hungry for venison just now.
Mortigan the Denied
Thursday, February 10, 2011
To Group Or Not To Group?
Somewhere in the middle of the Twilight Highlands, Mortigan hit 85. Which leaves me wondering if I should keep working Twilight Highlands quests or focus on the Cataclysm 5-man dungeons - which I have not run AT ALL yet. So far, I'm still running the quests despite my lack of interest in helping Dwarves (a side-effect of having been Undead for a VERY long time).
I must admit though that the Dwarven wedding was worth the pile of gathering quests I had to run to get it. On one of those gathering quests, Mortigan was even killed - quickly - by a pack of Highland Worgs when far too many were pulled. (Apparently they're cannibals.) It was a unique experience far more amusing this morning than it was last night.
In some of the limited research I've done on what gear Mortigan needs, it comes as no surprise that he must be Exalted with pretty much everyone... and fortunately, the faction change allows quests to be run again in areas I've already destroyed (because now I'm running the Ally quests instead of the Horde quests). So hopefully I can reach Exalted without running TOO many dailies. My disposition doesn't sit well with dailies, as my previous employers - the lazy, good-for-nothing-but-shoulder-enchants Sons of Hodir will testify to. Hmmmm... now that I'm Ally, I wonder if I can go back and slaughter them all? Better check if I'm still going to need those shoulder enchants first. If not, this ex-employee will go POSTAL in Dun Niffelem! "Remember ME?! I'M BACK!"
Overall, the quests are interesting, and my unfamiliarity with the new LFG tool keeps me from branching out into the dungeons so far. It also means Mortigan will be better geared when he finally does start grouping, and he won't be quite so embarrassing when he finally starts showing up on Recount meters. Having some troll post only Morty's Recount stats as a sort of commentless comment saying "YOUR DPS SUCKS" is enough to send Morty back to the Horde just so that he can light Mr. Recount on fire. "How's the DPS NOW?!"
Mortigan the Ungrouped
I must admit though that the Dwarven wedding was worth the pile of gathering quests I had to run to get it. On one of those gathering quests, Mortigan was even killed - quickly - by a pack of Highland Worgs when far too many were pulled. (Apparently they're cannibals.) It was a unique experience far more amusing this morning than it was last night.
In some of the limited research I've done on what gear Mortigan needs, it comes as no surprise that he must be Exalted with pretty much everyone... and fortunately, the faction change allows quests to be run again in areas I've already destroyed (because now I'm running the Ally quests instead of the Horde quests). So hopefully I can reach Exalted without running TOO many dailies. My disposition doesn't sit well with dailies, as my previous employers - the lazy, good-for-nothing-but-shoulder-enchants Sons of Hodir will testify to. Hmmmm... now that I'm Ally, I wonder if I can go back and slaughter them all? Better check if I'm still going to need those shoulder enchants first. If not, this ex-employee will go POSTAL in Dun Niffelem! "Remember ME?! I'M BACK!"
Overall, the quests are interesting, and my unfamiliarity with the new LFG tool keeps me from branching out into the dungeons so far. It also means Mortigan will be better geared when he finally does start grouping, and he won't be quite so embarrassing when he finally starts showing up on Recount meters. Having some troll post only Morty's Recount stats as a sort of commentless comment saying "YOUR DPS SUCKS" is enough to send Morty back to the Horde just so that he can light Mr. Recount on fire. "How's the DPS NOW?!"
Mortigan the Ungrouped
Thursday, February 3, 2011
How to Survive as a Coward on a PVP Server
If you hate PVP as much as ol' Morty here, but nevertheless find yourself trying to eke out your existence on a PVP realm, you've come to the right place! Within just a few days on Daggerspine-US, I have MAXED OUT my Cowardly Survival skill, and have plenty of pointers to share on how you too can [usually] escape the long cold hand of death. Here are the nuggets of wisdom I've gleaned so far:
1. Some traffic-heavy points in a zone, such as the Throne Room of Phaoris in Uldum, are not marked as Sanctuary but nevertheless ARE. So when you swoop in at top speed from your ultra-cool (and now slightly retro) proto-drake, landing right in front of Phaoris himself, you can trust Morty that there is NOTHING to fear should you find yourself in a crowd of red-labeled overgeared 85s. Just ingore them and walk right up to Phaoris as if you BELONG there. You do! Although leaving may be another matter, right now you're as safe as Pinocchio in the belly of the whale! Carry on about your business as if no one else is there. And should one of those red-labeled Nasties get too itchy for a fight and attempt to impale you on the outrageously large sword they certainly don't deserve to own, it is very important that you follow these steps precisely:
- Target the person attempting to kill you.
- Click on the chat box. They're going to understand you this time, trust me.
- type the following: /laugh
- By the time you are done typing the above, Mr. Red-Label should be thoroughly dead at the hands of Phaoris' guards.
- Press Enter. Your would-be killer will now be feeling stupid and embarrassed - especially if his friends got to watch the entertainment.
2. Plan on spending a LOT of time mounted, hovering in the air, going nowhere, high enough up that no one can target you. This is what not only cowards like you and I do, this is what EVERYONE does. Have a look around. You'll see all sorts of winged creatures in the air doing absolutely nothing other than keeping their owners out of death's reach.
3. This could almost be part of #2 above - FLY EVERYWHERE. Killing 12 Rabid Chickens for a quest? Fly right down on top of Rabid Chicken #1, snap his neck off, get the Rabid Gizzard Quest Item (how else will you earn that 8 gold?), then IMMEDIATELY mount and fly straight up! Hurry, man - somebody might have seen your cowardly butt on the ground and come over to investigate what you're doing! Have a look around to be sure no one waiting for you to land again. If the coast is clear, swoop in on Rabid Chicken #2. Rinse and repeat.
4. Sometimes you just can't avoid coming within striking range of a red-labeled Nasty while on the ground. Your best hope is that he/she is a coward as well, and wants nothing more than to find their own Rabid Chickens to kill. Go ahead and wave at them. See if they wave back. No? Mount and hover, fool! If they wave or salute back, the chances that you will survive in their proximity have greatly increased. Pat yourself on the back! You may also find it helpful to use real-life school survival skills: wish yourself "invisible and unnoticeable" whenever in higher traffic areas, and get rid of any brightly colored clothing that might attract a bully's attention. Trust me, it works!
5. When they do attack, and there is no nearby assistance, there is NO DISHONOR in running like a fool for your very life. Use whatever speed increasing spells, abilities, or potions you may have. The object is to STAY ALIVE. Better to be a live coward than a brave corpse.
Ultimately, being on a PVP server is a lot like high school. Prepare to be humiliated by those bigger and stronger than you... especially if they enjoy hearing the muffled scream of your face in the toilet. In turn, you have the ability to carry on the chain of abuse to those of lower level and lesser geared than you. Personally, I only like to gank lowbies when the difference in level is EXCESSIVE. For one, it absolutely ensures survival of the encounter, and two, it's funny as heck to one-shot some poor level 10 into the great black and white. After all, it's the cowardly thing to do!
Mortigan the Tail-Tucked
1. Some traffic-heavy points in a zone, such as the Throne Room of Phaoris in Uldum, are not marked as Sanctuary but nevertheless ARE. So when you swoop in at top speed from your ultra-cool (and now slightly retro) proto-drake, landing right in front of Phaoris himself, you can trust Morty that there is NOTHING to fear should you find yourself in a crowd of red-labeled overgeared 85s. Just ingore them and walk right up to Phaoris as if you BELONG there. You do! Although leaving may be another matter, right now you're as safe as Pinocchio in the belly of the whale! Carry on about your business as if no one else is there. And should one of those red-labeled Nasties get too itchy for a fight and attempt to impale you on the outrageously large sword they certainly don't deserve to own, it is very important that you follow these steps precisely:
- Target the person attempting to kill you.
- Click on the chat box. They're going to understand you this time, trust me.
- type the following: /laugh
- By the time you are done typing the above, Mr. Red-Label should be thoroughly dead at the hands of Phaoris' guards.
- Press Enter. Your would-be killer will now be feeling stupid and embarrassed - especially if his friends got to watch the entertainment.
2. Plan on spending a LOT of time mounted, hovering in the air, going nowhere, high enough up that no one can target you. This is what not only cowards like you and I do, this is what EVERYONE does. Have a look around. You'll see all sorts of winged creatures in the air doing absolutely nothing other than keeping their owners out of death's reach.
3. This could almost be part of #2 above - FLY EVERYWHERE. Killing 12 Rabid Chickens for a quest? Fly right down on top of Rabid Chicken #1, snap his neck off, get the Rabid Gizzard Quest Item (how else will you earn that 8 gold?), then IMMEDIATELY mount and fly straight up! Hurry, man - somebody might have seen your cowardly butt on the ground and come over to investigate what you're doing! Have a look around to be sure no one waiting for you to land again. If the coast is clear, swoop in on Rabid Chicken #2. Rinse and repeat.
4. Sometimes you just can't avoid coming within striking range of a red-labeled Nasty while on the ground. Your best hope is that he/she is a coward as well, and wants nothing more than to find their own Rabid Chickens to kill. Go ahead and wave at them. See if they wave back. No? Mount and hover, fool! If they wave or salute back, the chances that you will survive in their proximity have greatly increased. Pat yourself on the back! You may also find it helpful to use real-life school survival skills: wish yourself "invisible and unnoticeable" whenever in higher traffic areas, and get rid of any brightly colored clothing that might attract a bully's attention. Trust me, it works!
5. When they do attack, and there is no nearby assistance, there is NO DISHONOR in running like a fool for your very life. Use whatever speed increasing spells, abilities, or potions you may have. The object is to STAY ALIVE. Better to be a live coward than a brave corpse.
Ultimately, being on a PVP server is a lot like high school. Prepare to be humiliated by those bigger and stronger than you... especially if they enjoy hearing the muffled scream of your face in the toilet. In turn, you have the ability to carry on the chain of abuse to those of lower level and lesser geared than you. Personally, I only like to gank lowbies when the difference in level is EXCESSIVE. For one, it absolutely ensures survival of the encounter, and two, it's funny as heck to one-shot some poor level 10 into the great black and white. After all, it's the cowardly thing to do!
Mortigan the Tail-Tucked
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)