Last night looked very promising. I logged on, and IMMEDIATELY queue for my random ZG/ZA, since the DPS average wait time is back to 30 minutes or so again. But a more immediate offer came through Guild Chat.
"I'm a tank. Anyone for a random ZG/ZA?"
Three DPS (myself included) immediately accepted the offer, giving us a 4-man group only lacking a healer. With no healers immediately available in the guild, we went ahead and queued, and quickly picked up a PUG healer who had never run the ZG dungeon selected for us.
"I've never been in here, just so you know." He admitted.
"All you need is a high tolerance for wipes." I responded.
"No problem there."
We made our way past the poison clouds and bees to the first big stupid wooden mask, who killed one of my DPS Guildies with his laser vision. Guildie immediately quit/logged/dc'ed/died or something. He was GONE. At least he was smart enough not to stay online where we could have berated him in guild chat for being spineless.
After killing the big stupid mask and moving right along to the snake brothers and their green cauldron, more trouble lie in store for our group. Despite me specifically stating not to let the green debuff run out (important info our virgin healer needed to know), our other DPS Guildie did not heed my warning, let it run out, and got himself dead.
"That's all I can take." he said, and left the group. Really? That's all? One death? How did you EVER manage to level to 85?
"What is UP with our Guild leaving the group?!" I asked the tank, now the only other member of our Guild still with me.
"I don't know. I only joined the guild 15 minutes ago." He said.
"Oh. Welcome! And, uh... we aren't ALL spineless quitters and cry-babies."
While waiting for a fresh set of DPS, we moved on into the next room where the High Priest with his green poison maze awaited. Things got weird at that point.
A good set of people joined. Lots of shiny gear, with smoke and glowing bits sticking out here and there. They looked pretty dangerous. I was feeling positive about it. Then our virgin healer DC'ed. Could've been an internet problem, because nothing was really happening and he'd been doing fine up to that point.
The new healer arrived, and I quickly Soul Stoned him and buffed with Dark Intent. But before the tank could pull, the healer was gone - he'd zoned back to SW and was in the Trade District - and would not respond to our messages of "Are you coming?!?" Finally he quit the group. I was gape-mouthed. Friggin healer ran off with my Soul Stone! (In a previous post, I wrote that I hoped that they were building an extra-deep pit in hell for Soul Stone Quitters. - If they've completed it yet, they can test the depth of it by tossing in THIS GUY first.)
While the tank was trying to ask why the healer left, the rest of the new shiny gear crew did the same. They all took off. I don't get it, and neither did he. Why spend 30 minutes in queue, just to enter a zone, stare at a boss for less than a minute, then quit without even making an attempt?
"Is there a revolving door in here?" I asked.
The tank requeued us again, and we picked up two very unassuming DPS and new healer. The two DPS had none of the prior quitters shiny smoking flashy fancy gear. They looked fresh out of a regular instance. Per my usual policy, I didn't bother to review their gear though, or even look at what type of DPS they were. I just made another check of my buffs to be sure everything I needed was up, gave the new healer Dark Intent (no Soul Stone of course - still on CD), and then the Tank pulled Mr. Poison Maze before anyone else had a chance to quit.
I went from being #1 DPS with my 11.5K to just about dead last. Because our two new unassuming DPS toons were rocking 29K each. It was CRAZY! Mr. Poison Maze only got to go through one cycle. When he came back down from the top of his stairs, he died while he was still in that stunned crouch.
Suddenly, things were looking a LOT sunnier. ZG became a faceroll. These guys were killing trash before I could get my first spell off. I knew at that point that I was just along for the ride. We killed the boss that rides the dino-bone mount without ever bothering to kill the mount (thereby picking up the achievement). We rolled over cat-woman and everyone else in our way. And we were done in a very short amount of time.
Ultimately, I guess it worked out that a pile of people dropped in and out until we had a super-winning combination. Given a choice, I group with the guys putting out crazy DPS every time. But I still can't figure out what's going on with all the quitting. Are these 1-shot quitters like that Chess Champion who could foresee a distant unfavorable outcome - and therefore just quit immediately rather than continue? Or did their modem suddenly explode? Why join a random heroic and then immediately leave before even one fight? It makes no sense to me.
If you're guilty doing of this, I'd be VERY interested in hearing from you in the comments. What is going on - why join and then quit? Why quit after one wipe? I promise not to be judgmental (see the halo I'm wearing?) - you know from reading my posts just how ABSOLUTELY FAIR AND UNBIASED all of my posts are. So go ahead a write to me all about it!
Mortigan the EXTREMELY Patient